(His)Panic at the Office
by ofcourseitsyaoi
Summary: Oscar Martinez is murdered one rainy day at the office, launching an all-out search to find the culprit who could quite possibly be one of the employees. *SEASON 9 SPOILERS*


The office resonated softly with the sound of phones and employees chattering away lazily to their clients. It had been a horrendously slow, uneventful day and everyone was itching to get home. Alas, it was only 2 o'clock. Rain pattered against the windows steadily, leaving the skies awash in a thick, gray cloud cover. The smell of ozone leaked through the walls, permeating the small space.

"Oh, I love it when it rains. Don't you, Stanley?" Phyllis commented, typing away at her keyboard.

"No, I do not; and don't bother asking me about the weather, I do _not_ care." Stanley droned, his bloodshot eyes not leaving his near-completed crossword puzzle. Phyllis giggled, returning to her computer-workings.

"I love going to bars when it rains," Meredith chimed in from nearby. "Brings in a whole new type of company. You know, leather-jackets, bikers, those kinds of guys." Creed nodded in approval.

"You love going to bars _period_," Dwight scoffed, fiddling with a pen as he spun lazily in his chair. "I wouldn't be surprised if you burst into flames one day after lighting a cigarette."

"Little low, Dwight," Jim added, plugging numbers into his desk phone before picking it up. His rotation had put him in Scranton for the time being, gracing everyone with his uplifting, albeit cynical, presence. He didn't mind, though. He enjoyed Scranton far more than Philadelphia, considering he got to work right next to his wife, Pam.

"Yeah, Meredith can hold her liquor pretty well, actually. I went drinking with her once," Pam chuckled, sipping from her coffee mug. "Remember, Jim? I was telling you about it a while ago."

"Ah, yes, after that…lice…thing that I was fortunately absent for," Jim responded before launching into a sales call. Dwight sneered and got up from his chair, walking towards the copier.

"Ugh. I hate the rain…I can never wear white shirts when it rains," Angela complained, looking down spitefully at her white blouse. She sighed in defeat, gazing longingly at a picture of one of her many cats she had on her desk.

"Then maybe you shouldn't have worn white today, Angela," Oscar added in, typing out expense reports.

"I didn't know it was going to rain today, Oscar, or else I would've brought my umbrella. Be more observant," Angela quipped pointedly. She still held contempt towards the Hispanic man for sleeping with her husband on several accounts, but she couldn't keep the spite from her voice.

"Come on, guys, it'll be over by the time work is done," Kevin mediated, looking between the two anxiously. He had never approved of the rain either, but he wasn't about to take sides. He distracted himself by grabbing a handful of M&Ms from the jar on his desk.

"And what if it isn't, Kevin? What then?" Angela retorted, her voice dripping with condescension.

"I was just saying, Angela, that if…uh…well, you could…" Kevin mumbled, trailing off. Angela tsk'd in annoyance, returning to her current task.

Andy emerged from his office, strolling along and surveying the employees as they typed. He continued strolling until he reached Jim's desk.

"Hey, Tuna, got any plans for the weekend?" he whispered near Jim's ear. Jim covered the receiver of his phone, looking up at the branch manager.

"I'm on an important sales call," he murmured, looking back and forth between Andy and Pam.

"Well, Andy needs an important Jim call," Andy enunciated, standing up straight. Jim looked confusedly at Pam who raised her eyebrows, pressing her lips together.

"Let me just call you back," Jim spoke into the receiver, hanging it up. He spun around in his chair to face the man, resting his chin in his hand. "Yes, boss?"

"I was thinking that maybe we could all go, you know, see a movie on the weekend?" Andy chattered, nodding his head towards Pam who looked to Jim. "Been needing some bro time since Erin…you know…" He pursed his lips, looking away. He looked as if he were about to cry. Jim peeked over his shoulder at Pam, who shrugged nervously.

"Ah…I'm gonna be in Philadelphia this weekend, so…" Jim responded, dragging each word out.

"Oh, then maybe just me and Pam-" Andy started, but trailed off as Pam began shaking her head furiously.

"Cece and Phillip need someone to watch them, so I'll be busy all weekend too," Pam said sheepishly, rubbing the back of her neck. Andy nodded once before turning on his heel to stroll towards the copier.

"Hey, Dwight-"

"No." Dwight stacked his freshly made copies so they made a neat pile before taking it back to his desk. Andy nodded once again, biting his upper lip. He made his way towards the Accounting desk clump.

"Hey, Oscar, do you maybe wanna catch a movie later?" He asked quietly, rocking on his heels behind the accountant.

"No offense, Andy, but you're not my type," Oscar responded curtly without turning around.

"No, not like in the _gay_ _way_, I just mean…never mind." Andy hung his head, turning around quickly without asking the other two.

"Wow, Oscar, you could have let him down easy," Kevin giggled to himself, looking from Oscar to Angela suggestively. Angela sighed, shaking her head.

Without responding, Oscar stood up with a stack of papers. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to gather the shipping information from the warehouse." He left the desk clump, making his way out the front entrance of the office.

Andy strolled at a quicker pace through the kitchen towards the annex. Pete and Clark were working at their desks as they were expected to, with Toby clattering away noisily at his keyboard.

"Hey, Clark." Andy shoved his hands into his pockets, looking down at the employee. Clark didn't turn around.

"Hey, boss." He continued typing while Pete, who sat across from him, raised his eyebrows. Andy shot him a dirty look. He had felt nothing but a distant hatred towards the lanky man after he had "stolen" Erin from him. Pete cleared his throat before turning back to his computer. After Andy didn't move on from Clark's desk, Clark decided to engage in conversation. He swung around in his chair, crossing his legs. "Can I help you?"

"Indeed you can, boy-o, by hanging out with me this very weekend," Andy proposed in a thick British accent. He raised his eyebrows as Clark remained silent, eagerly awaiting a response.

"Oh…uh, jeez, I don't know boss…" Clark mumbled, looking around nervously for an excuse to get out of spending quality time with the "Nard Dog".

"Come oooon, Clark, it'll be fun!" Andy chattered, grinning. His smile faltered as the man remained silent.

"You know, Andy, I'm free this weekend, if you want to-" Toby piped up, turning around in his desk.

"No, no, no, just…no, Toby. No." Andy sneered in annoyance before turning around and leaving the Annex. He sighed as he returned to his office where he began playing with the desk toys strewn around his work space. He couldn't remember the time he started fooling around in his office, but by the time he emerged one again, it was time for everyone to pack up.

"Ah, good work today, guys. Oh, I almost forgot, we gotta sing Closing Time!" Andy piped up, clapping his hands together.

"No, we will not," Stanley interjected as Andy was reaching for the small stereo resting by the door of his office.

"Oh come on, Stanley, I know you love that song," Andy argued, resting against the wall.

"Not today. I just wanna get home and away from this blasted weather," he mumbled angrily, picking up his briefcase.

"Ah. Alright then…guess I'll let you guys off without it…" responded Andy, a little sadly. He noticed that Oscar wasn't at his desk. "Hey, you guys, did Oscar go home already?"

Angela was too busy putting on her white jacket to respond.

"Uhh…you know, Andy, I don't think he even came back from his trip to the warehouse," Kevin responded, looking back and forth between his peers.

"That's unlike Oscar, to go home early," Phyllis added as she began making her way towards the entrance.

"Huh. I'll ask him about it tomorrow. Hey, I'll walk with you guys to the lobby," Andy called to his employees as he grabbed his coat. Angela sneered at Kevin as she saw it was still raining outside. They walked in a large group towards the elevator, chattering away in a friendly manner. Everyone was glad to finally end such a boring day.

They all crammed in together, much to everyone's discomfort.

"Does _anyone_ wanna hang out with me on the weekend?" Andy made one final attempt in netting a friend. Everyone looked away to nothing in particular.

"Why, I'll hang out with you Andy," Nellie responded, smiling kindly. She was not particularly fond of him, but still, she hated to see the man lonely.

"Ugh, NO. Don't you guys get it? I need _someone_ to hang out with!" Andy exclaimed, looking around as everyone groaned. He sighed in defeat as the elevator doors slid open, revealing the front lobby in front of them. The road outside was slick with rain, a thin mist lingering in the air. The soft yet familiar scent of rain clung to the walls of the lobby, creating a refreshing yet damp atmosphere. The soft sound of rain pattering down on metal cars filled everyone's ears, along with the collective gasp as Oscar was found slouched against a wall, in a pool of his own blood.


End file.
